I can't remember where I read this little sentence but it seems to me to be an absolutely wonderful catch phrase for losers.People who have 'the courage to not come first' are able to do a lot more than those who must come first. In fact, it seems to me that we have the chance to live a lot more.
For one thing if you have 'the courage to not come first' you don't have to do something in a hurry - if it means that you have to get somewhere, or do something, first. That's far less strenuous and, if it's less of an effort, then it's going to be easier isn't it?. You don't have to get it, whatever 'it' is, done by that deadline that will beat everyone. So you can fit 'it' in just whenever it suits you.
So, thank you very much, I'm not setting myself targets to improve my performance.
There are lots of problems in having to be the world champion in this, the leading expert in that, the top performer in the other...For one thing, with that goal in mind you'll spend a lot of time being unsatisfied until you've got there. Your life is likely to be one set of strenuous efforts followed by disappointments. Naturally, you will be euphoric - if and when you make it - for a time. If you watch the media you will see lots of people who do make it. They get the coverage. But how long does it last, and how many of them are there? For every person that makes it - there's got to be lots of people filling that very important role, the one's that were not good enough.
Have you ever noticed? There's more of the ones that were not good enough. Your chances of being in that group are far higher. So why do you even bother?
I once wrote a book and got it published. Thereafter I wanted to write another one - I wanted to be the leading expert in something or other. Anything would have done, as long as it rescued the world from its problems and showed the true way - and as long as I was recognised as the expert. Funny thing is however - I've recently noticed it - the bookshops are full of books that are described, on their covers, as 'book of the decade' that 'will definitely change your life' etc. And when I read them they were all quite convincing. I've ended up dabbling with lots of other people's ideas and I've noticed that I've got nothing very original to say.
What's even worse is that I've discovered there are things that seem important - but in a topic or field where I am a complete beginner - or which I know virtually nothing about. If I am going to look into these things I'm not going to be able to be an expert for ages. How humiliating! Dare I even start?
I was once a Marxist on the far left and we all thought we had a "higher level of consciousness" - it seems now that I knew virtually nothing. As I get older the main thing I've learned is how little I've learned.
For example, I recently had a taster session of Shiatzu massage. The therapist thought I would benefit from something called 'Bowen Therapy'. I'd never heard of it before. But it certainly does some spectacular things to the way I feel in my body. It's started me doing simple Yoga and I think I really feel calmer and better for it.
But I can't write the definitive texts about this topic. I can't rescue the world with these ideas - for one thing writing about these things is not very convincing, you have to have them done to you (Bowen Therapy) or do them yourself (Yoga). Then you become convinced as you cannot deny their effects. Intellectual arguments and clever writing doesn't come into it. For another thing other people already got there - Bowen Technique has been around for decades and Yoga for hundreds of years.
The courage not to come first is about being ordinary. It's only when you are ordinary that important things open up to you. The sort of things that won't get you fame or a regular slot on the TV - the things that actually matter.
Funnily enough that's quite democratic. It's equalitarian. Someone else can have my 15 minutes of fame.
Brian Davey